How to adapt to moving back home in your twenties
Moved back home? You aren't alone!
It’s quite common nowadays for people to be living at home in their twenties. With it being more expensive than ever to get on the property ladder, it’s no surprise that a lot of young people are choosing to live at home and save money. I moved back home myself straight after finishing university. So it’s been three years of living back at home and I thought it was about time I reflect on what I've learnt over the years.
I know lots of my friends in a similar situation to me. While I used to get a bit embarrassed about telling people I live with my parents still, now I don’t feel too bad about it. The people I know who have managed to move out, usually work in London so need to rent somewhere nearby or they’re in a relationship. Obviously the latter makes it a whole lot easier to get a place when you’re splitting the cost.
Of course everyone has different financial circumstances but it’s about making the most of where you are. I live pretty close to London and Oxford, I can drive, have a nice gym to go to and an endless supply of home-cooked food and clean laundry - thanks Mum and Dad!
I’m lucky to get on with my family really well. They give me space so I can pretty much do whatever I want, whenever I want. However I can’t deny there aren’t times when our four bedroom house feels too crowded (I'm one of three) and I wish I had a place of my own. It’s nothing against my family whatsoever though. I think it’s a natural part of growing up. Especially having lived away from home for three years, it’s something I know I can do. Not to mention I love the idea of decorating a bigger space than my bedroom.
I’d like to try living in London for a while but I haven’t quite found the right time or job situation that’s allowed me to. Maybe something for the new year? I figure if I end up disliking it, which I don’t think I would, it’s not the end of the world.You don’t have to be stuck in one place forever and I’m not the kind of person who wants to settle down in one place for the rest of my life.
"You don’t have to be stuck in one place forever and I’m not the kind of person who wants to settle down in one place for the rest of my life."
MAKING A HOUSE A HOME
So after that rather ramble backstory to my living situation, I thought I’d share my top five tips to not go crazy living at home in your twenties:
1. Make your room a haven. As my bedroom is my main hangout, I like to keep it as tidy and cosy as possible. If you’re spending a lot of time somewhere, make it as pleasurable a place to be in as possible. I’m going to be painting my room this weekend as the walls are quite marked. I can’t wait for a fresh lick of paint to brighten up the room! You can’t go wrong with candles either.
2. Know you aren’t alone. As I said above, there are lots of people in the same circumstances as you. I recommend listening to this podcast episode by Ella and Monica as they both discuss their different living situations. It’s nothing to be embarrassed about! Maybe I could have saved more money by now but I think life is for living and I don’t regret spending money on holidays and socialising. Although maybe that extra top from Zara could have been given a miss…
3. Help out. I know everyone has different points of view when it comes to paying parents rent when living at home. I personally wouldn’t feel comfortable paying nothing, especially as I have expensive taste in food (hello avocados and almond milk) so pay my dad some rent each month to go towards such things. It’s not a huge amount and a lot less than I’d be paying elsewhere. It allows me to save while also becoming accustomed to budgeting my outgoings. If I’m out I’ll tend to pick up food and I help out with household chores as much as I can. It makes me feel better that I’m doing something to help and is good practice for when I do move out.
4. Live your own life. I think one of the things I found most difficult when moving back home was having to do things on other people’s schedules. I’d rather just eat when it suits me or pop out whenever I want without having to tell people where I’m going. It’s completely fine now and I’m in a routine but I think it’s important to maintain that element of freedom.
5. But also make time to spend with your family. While I do generally do my own thing day to day, I still like to make time to sit and have dinner with everyone, typically on a Sunday. I’ll also text my mum to let her know I’ve arrived safely somewhere if I’m out or when I’m on my way home. At the end of the day parents are just looking out for us and they aren't going to be around forever so it’s important to be appreciative of that.
If you’re unhappy with where you’re living right now, take a moment to be grateful for simply having a roof over your head. Or even something smaller like an endless supply of bread and milk in the fridge! Nothing is forever. When it’s time for you to make the move it will happen. Share this post with anyone you know also living at home in their twenties and leave a comment telling me how you cope with living at home!